Sunday, August 19, 2012
Just thinking...
So. We are parents. This thought blows my mind almost every single day. The responsibility that comes along with it is so huge that it becomes too much to think about most of the time. Which is good, I think. Otherwise what would I become, if I thought of it always? A pile of worry, a giant heap of concern, regret, anxiety, guilt. These are the things that come along with having a baby that I hadn't thought about. The labor, the breastfeeding, the lack of sleep...all of these things I thought about constantly. What about all of the parenting pressures out there? What about the pressures you put on yourself? What about the insane responsibility to raise a wonderful, happy, smart, kind, joyful...child. I mean, I'm exhausted just thinking about the pressure, let alone from the actual weight of it. But the thing is, the thing is that it is so big, and if you really think about it too much it will backfire. If you read too many books, if you succumb to too many rules, if you focus all of your attention on doing it RIGHT you will inevitably do it WRONG. Being a parent is like being an athlete, there is only so much training you can do before you just have to trust yourself, and as they say "get into the zone". Confidence goes a remarkably long way as a new parent. I have always been a part of the "fake it 'till you make it" fan club. And for us that has been paramount in surviving, no not just surviving, but thriving in the first 6 months of this insane adventure we are on. Oh yeah. It's only been 9 months. Which means we haven't even gotten to any of the Parenting (capital P) yet. Which is even more mind blowing. That I could spend as much time as I do worrying about nurturing this amazing person and we have barely even begun. Maybe I am writing this, maybe I am telling myself all of this as a reminder. In the future when the tough stuff happens I'll have the months and years behind me, a lot of training, and hopefully I'll be able to find this zone. Maybe if we just keep holding our heads up our little girl will trust us, we seem to know what we're doing. We appear to be capable, and to her that is all she needs.
For the love of food...
Produce Delivery Bin |
I'm not going to lie, as amazing as this menu is we totally stopped following it about a month ago. So why? Why do I keep going on about how amazing it is? Why did I just waste an entire blog paragraph babbling about it? Because it's structure and it's presence help us organize our meal thoughts. If we can't think of something, or we're just too tired to be creative, we can look up at the menu and say "hey! it says here that it's BLT and salad night!" done. Another reason we ended up not following it exactly is that we started getting organic produce deliveries every other week. This alone has dictated so much of what we eat, in a similar way as the menu has. By limiting our options we actually opened up our options. It's a lot easier to look at the week ahead with a suggested menu in one hand and a fridge full of produce and make decisions. We haven't had take out in over two weeks, and the last couple times we ate out were breakfasts because they are fun and they have pancakes. Plus, breakfast is always loud! Families just pouring all over the place, we fit right in! Pancakes on the floor! Blueberries in our hair! Just like everyone else! It is a really good way to make sure Bean gets out and gets comfortable with restaurants without disturbing other diners date nights.
Lyla's relationship with food is very important to us. Be it getting comfortable with restaurants and understanding how they work, to knowing that meal times mean the family sits down together and eats together, to knowing what whole foods taste like, and that there is a world of flavors and it's all hers if she wants it! And most importantly that food is energy AND it's fun and my hope above all hopes is that she has a POSITIVE relationship with eating and food. A very different experience than I have had in my past. For as much as I love food my relationship with it has been very dysfunctional. A lot of weight issues, a lot of guilt attached to food. Blech. Some really horrible feelings that I hope my daughter doesn't have to encounter.
For me, with all of my anxiety and control issues, food was something I felt I could control, for good or for bad. In my early twenties this manifested as eating disorders, in my adulthood it's manifested as a love for cooking. Thank god for cooking. It may have saved my life. Nothing feels better than spending a few hours in the kitchen, all of the stresses slip away and I feel a sense of power and of calm. It is especially rewarding when I get to feed my family. So when it came time for Lyla to start eating solids I couldn't wait to get in there and start cooking. I have such little control over anything anymore, a big lesson for me to learn, and one I am welcoming with open arms. I can plan and plan and plan and in one second all of that will have to change. It's freeing, but it can also still be difficult at times. So once again I take solace in the one thing that I can take charge of and that is food.
Snack time! |
Mint Carrots, frozen for later |
Turkey Party Patties |
Kale Pesto Pasta |
Oh, and don't worry guys. It won't be ALL tofu and kale for this babe. Look at her parents. I mean for reals, her dad has been known to devour an entire sleeve of Oreos in one sitting. And I haven't met a pizza I didn't fall in love with. We're just tricking her now into loving all the good stuff, we'll let her grandparents show her the goooood stuff.
Health food may be good for the conscience but Oreos taste a hell of a lot better. -Robert Redford
If you really want to make a friend, go to someone's
house and eat with him... the people who give you their food give you
their heart. -Cesar Chavez
Monday, August 6, 2012
Just like the fourth of July...
It get's harder and harder to make friends the older you get. When my two besties and I ended up living in different cities for most of our college years I thought it would be impossible to make friends like that again, but I did, I met some of my best friends in college. But, when all of my college friends left our little city for bigger and better job opportunities I thought that would really be it. I would have to visit them all over the country in order to have that good of friends. Because at 23 I really thought I had made the best of the friends I would ever have. I should've learned to not trust my worries, because it was in my mid twenties that I met my best friend. She wasn't in a very good place, was in the middle of a tough relationship, had been knocked down a few times in her life. But it wasn't me swooping in to help her out, help her through this tough time, that is not how we became friends. No, it was the other way around. In the middle of all her crap, she lent us a hand though only knowing us in passing. This act, taking Jesse and I in when we needed a place to live for a month, is so representative of who she is as a friend. Jesse only lived there for two weeks until he went off to Oregon for his summer job (I joined him just two weeks later). In those two weeks when it was just the two of us, me finishing my art school final projects, us talking over bad television and even worse beer. We opened up, we bonded, and thus solidified our storybook friendship.
When she started dating her soon to be husband he would get so confused when the two of us were together. Because it would appear that we were having full conversations, understanding everything the other was saying, and yet only a few words would leave our mouth. We were speaking our secret language, one we didn't even know we had. Jesse and I had been together for awhile when her and I met so he never even paid attention to our babbling. But this new guy thought it was hilarious. And Jesse and I loved this new guy. Not just because he was such a vast improvement over the other guys, but because he was genuinely a great guy and one we immediately attached ourselves to. So much so that the four of us (plus a stowaway) took an all night road trip to San Francisco just months after they started dating. Well, we couldn't have been happier when they got engaged, or sadder when they moved 9 hours away (he got his dream job). And I couldn't have been more honored to have been asked to be her maid of honor.
Which! Is kind of why I started writing this post. Just this last weekend we flew up our bride to be to enjoy a weekend in the city, to relax, and to see family, and to take a break from wedding planning. We had a small shower at her sister's house, it was all sorts of america. With sliders and potato salad. Lemon drop martini's (yum!) and champagne jell-o. And to top it off, Pie! We followed this up with some line dancing lessons, a rooftop sunset and cocktail, and her and I ended the night with a glass of champagne and our feet up. Which is just how we started our friendship, although the alcohol has gotten better.
We had visited her and her fiance the week before and she made us these amazing turkey burgers. So, while I had planned to make beef sliders, I took notes from her and decided to make turkey sliders instead. When the men returned to pick up their women from the shower they hovered around the left over sliders and devoured them. So it is by request of the brides sister that I post my recipe, as vague and homecooking as it is.
All American Turkey Sliders
(Did you know the wild Turkey was ALMOST the national bird for the USA? The more you know...ding ding ding)
All ingredients are "ish".
1 lb ground turkey
1 egg
2 tbls soy sauce
2 tbls Worcestershire sauce
1 tbls garlic powder
1 tbls dried oregano
1/4 onion shredded
1 slice of bread toasted and ground into bread crumbs
Salt
Pepper
Combine all the ingredients (hands work best here, especially little kid hands!). Form into 2 1/2 inch round patties and line them on a baking sheet about an inch apart. Bake in a 375 degree oven for 20-30 minutes. Add cheese at the end if you'd like. I served them on potato rolls. But some stores offer slider buns now! You can grill the burgers too, they would be awesome that way! Since I was cooking thirty of them at a party (i doubled this recipe) I needed to cook a lot of them without having to hover over a grill.
Stick 'em with an american flag pick, sing the National Anthem, and get your America on. I just realized how perfectly appropriate these are for the Olympics. Ahhh, the Olympics, that is a whole other post on it's own...
The parties were a blast, I love my bff, and I cannot wait for the REAL party in just a few weeks.
When she started dating her soon to be husband he would get so confused when the two of us were together. Because it would appear that we were having full conversations, understanding everything the other was saying, and yet only a few words would leave our mouth. We were speaking our secret language, one we didn't even know we had. Jesse and I had been together for awhile when her and I met so he never even paid attention to our babbling. But this new guy thought it was hilarious. And Jesse and I loved this new guy. Not just because he was such a vast improvement over the other guys, but because he was genuinely a great guy and one we immediately attached ourselves to. So much so that the four of us (plus a stowaway) took an all night road trip to San Francisco just months after they started dating. Well, we couldn't have been happier when they got engaged, or sadder when they moved 9 hours away (he got his dream job). And I couldn't have been more honored to have been asked to be her maid of honor.
Which! Is kind of why I started writing this post. Just this last weekend we flew up our bride to be to enjoy a weekend in the city, to relax, and to see family, and to take a break from wedding planning. We had a small shower at her sister's house, it was all sorts of america. With sliders and potato salad. Lemon drop martini's (yum!) and champagne jell-o. And to top it off, Pie! We followed this up with some line dancing lessons, a rooftop sunset and cocktail, and her and I ended the night with a glass of champagne and our feet up. Which is just how we started our friendship, although the alcohol has gotten better.
We had visited her and her fiance the week before and she made us these amazing turkey burgers. So, while I had planned to make beef sliders, I took notes from her and decided to make turkey sliders instead. When the men returned to pick up their women from the shower they hovered around the left over sliders and devoured them. So it is by request of the brides sister that I post my recipe, as vague and homecooking as it is.
All American Turkey Sliders
(Did you know the wild Turkey was ALMOST the national bird for the USA? The more you know...ding ding ding)
All ingredients are "ish".
1 lb ground turkey
1 egg
2 tbls soy sauce
2 tbls Worcestershire sauce
1 tbls garlic powder
1 tbls dried oregano
1/4 onion shredded
1 slice of bread toasted and ground into bread crumbs
Salt
Pepper
Combine all the ingredients (hands work best here, especially little kid hands!). Form into 2 1/2 inch round patties and line them on a baking sheet about an inch apart. Bake in a 375 degree oven for 20-30 minutes. Add cheese at the end if you'd like. I served them on potato rolls. But some stores offer slider buns now! You can grill the burgers too, they would be awesome that way! Since I was cooking thirty of them at a party (i doubled this recipe) I needed to cook a lot of them without having to hover over a grill.
Stick 'em with an american flag pick, sing the National Anthem, and get your America on. I just realized how perfectly appropriate these are for the Olympics. Ahhh, the Olympics, that is a whole other post on it's own...
The parties were a blast, I love my bff, and I cannot wait for the REAL party in just a few weeks.
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