Poseidon adventure.

Neptune is my new favorite planet. I'm not actually sure I had a favorite planet before this though. Maybe Pluto, but since they tell me it's not real I'm choosing Neptune. And that is final. I'm kind of obsessed with the blueness of it. The coldness of it. Did you know it is possibly the coldest place in the universe? Amazing. It also has weather, which is interesting because Uranus doesn't (unless you count wind, ha ha, that was a fart joke). It takes Neptune 165 years to orbit the sun, and it spends 14 years in each Zodiac. There is some debate as to what sign Neptune actually rules, but it's probably Pisces. According to wikipedia it was responsible for the communist utopia ideals in the 'Communist Manifesto', and impressionism. I am A-OK with that. Neptune will just be coming into retrograde at the end of this month and will be coming out of it right after I turn 30. This is exciting. When Mercury is in retrograde everything gets messed up. When Neptune is retrograde you get all these heightened senses, intuition peaks, and you have to be really careful to listen to yourself and what your feeling or you can slide into a depression. But if you do pay attention, oh boy, what amazing things could happen!

I think that everyone should have a favorite planet. It gives you something to really focus on. So when conversations about the universe come up you can go, "My favorite planet is...." And this should be followed by five interesting facts about your favorite planet. Everyone would be so much cooler if this happened. Maybe I am going to have to throw a Planet party. And I would invite a bunch of people who had to RSVP with their favorite planet and then I would only ACTUALLY invite 8 (maybe 9, cause I miss Pluto) of them that represented the planets and we would dress up like our planets and go to the bars. Which would not really make it a party. But it would be hilarious. We could orbit very attractive people and call them the sun.

A haiku for you, Neptune:

please stay where you are
it would be weird if that changed
you are blue and cold.